Entry #2

The Golden Ass Entry

Lucius: The Golden Ass and The Man After Adventure

Dear Journal,

Today was the worst day of my life. I turned into a donkey. Yes, a donkey. An ass. A four-legged beast of burden with long ears and a tail. How did that happen, you ask? Well, let me tell you.

It all started when I arrived in Thessaly, a region known for its witches and magic. I was curious and eager to learn more about these things, so I stayed at the house of Milo, a rich merchant, and fell in love with his maid Fotis, who was also a witch’s apprentice. One night, I saw her mistress Pamphile use an ointment to turn into an owl and fly away. I was so amazed by this that I begged Fotis to let me try the ointment too. She agreed, but she made a terrible mistake. She gave me the wrong ointment. Instead of turning into a bird, I turned into a donkey.

I can’t describe the horror and shock I felt when I realized what had happened. I tried to curse Fotis for her stupid mistake, but I could only bray like an ass. She was terrified and confused too, and she didn’t know how to reverse the spell. She told me to stay calm and wait until she could find the right ointment. But before she could do that, some robbers broke into the house and stole everything, including me.

And that was just the beginning of my troubles. As a donkey, I had to endure all kinds of hardships and humiliations. I was beaten, starved, overworked, and abused by various masters and strangers. I witnessed and experienced many crimes and calamities along the way. I also heard many stories within stories, such as the famous tale of Cupid and Psyche, which made me long for love and happiness.

But there was no end to my misery. No matter what I did or where I went, I couldn’t find a way to become human again. I prayed to all the gods and goddesses, but none of them answered me. I tried to eat roses, which were supposed to be the antidote for my condition, but they were either out of season or out of reach. I even tried to kill myself several times, but something always stopped me.

Finally, after many trials and tribulations, I had a vision of the mother of the universe, who revealed herself as Isis, the Egyptian goddess of nature and magic. She told me how to get a rose that would cure me of my donkey form. I followed her instructions, ate the rose, and voila! I was human again. I was so grateful to Isis that I decided to devote my life to her and her husband Osiris. I became a priest in their cult, and learned many secrets and mysteries, but that's a tale for another time.

And that’s my story, dear journal. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing it. Thank you for listening to me ramble on about my troubling misfortunes, and until next time…don’t be an ass!